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Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

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37,856 ratings · 7,220 reviews
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Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

4.85 37,856 ratings · 7,220 reviews
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Overview: In the tradition of Kitchen Confidential and Waiter Rant, a rollicking, eye-opening, fantastically indiscreet memoir of a life spent (and misspent) in the hotel industry. Jacob Tomsky never intended to go into the hotel business. As a new college graduate, armed only with a philosophy degree and a singular lack of career direction, he became a valet parker for a large luxury hotel in New Orleans. Yet, rising fast through the ranks, he ended up working in “hospitality” for more than a decade, doing everything from supervising the housekeeping department to manning the front desk at an upscale Manhattan hotel. He’s checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room-service meals, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late checkout, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&M's out of your minibar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. In Heads in Beds he pulls back the curtain to expose the crazy and compelling reality of a multi-billion-dollar industry we think we know. Heads in Beds is a funny, authentic, and irreverent chronicle of the highs and lows of hotel life, told by a keenly observant insider who’s seen it all. Prepare to be amused, shocked, and amazed as he spills the unwritten code of the bellhops, the antics that go on in the valet parking garage, the housekeeping department’s dirty little secrets—not to mention the shameless activities of the guests, who are rarely on their best behavior. Prepare to be moved, too, by his candor about what it’s like to toil in a highly demanding service industry at the luxury level, where people expect to get what they pay for (and often a whole lot more). Employees are poorly paid and frequently abused by coworkers and guests alike, and maintaining a semblance of sanity is a daily challenge.Along his journey Tomsky also reveals the secrets of the industry, offering easy ways to get what you need from your hotel without any hassle. This book (and a timely proffered twenty-dollar bill) will help you score late checkouts and upgrades, get free stuff galore, and make that pay-per-view charge magically disappear. Thanks to him you’ll know how to get the very best service from any business that makes its money from putting heads in beds. Or, at the very least, you will keep the bellmen from taking your luggage into the camera-free back office and bashing it against the wall repeatedly.

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Topics & Genres

Pages 247
Language Eng
Published November 20, 2012
ISBN 13331184
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Jacob Tomsky
About the Author
Jacob Tomsky
15,149 Followers

Jacob Tomsky is the author of several novels. Originally from the East Coast, they now live in the Midwest with family. In addition to writing, Jacob Tomsky enjoys gardening, cooking, and reading way past bedtime. Their work often explores the complexities of everyday life and human relationships.

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Susan  Parker
Susan Parker June 28, 2025
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Matthew Walker
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel.
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Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem.
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Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Such a rich narrative. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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Absolutely brilliant. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars.
Kenneth Garcia
Kenneth Garcia November 05, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Laura Robinson July 28, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A very distinguished novel.
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Absolutely brilliant. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars.
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David Cruz July 06, 2024
I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Rebecca Johnson
Rebecca Johnson February 27, 2024
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Andrew Perez
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Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel.
Donald Sanchez
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I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
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Deborah Cruz
Deborah Cruz December 02, 2025
Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars.
Donald Lee
Donald Lee August 30, 2024
Not entirely to my refined tastes. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. Perfectly average.
Andrew Nguyen
Andrew Nguyen December 20, 2025
Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading.
Andrew Walker
Andrew Walker October 29, 2024
I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Donna Anderson
Donna Anderson October 05, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Elizabeth Moore
Elizabeth Moore September 17, 2025
A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. Quite impressive overall.
Joseph Collins
Joseph Collins January 13, 2024
Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Matthew Wilson
Matthew Wilson July 27, 2024
Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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